Last Kiss
by MeganBellaRoseBlack
Summary: Little parts from the Doctor and Rivers life. They both seperately reflect on different times where they knew each other. Enjoy.


**A.N..**

**This is my first Doctor Who fic, and I've taken some authors liberties with the characters and timelines and such, but I really hope you like it! Let me know what you think :D The song is Last Kiss by Taylor Swift. **

**Thank you. **

**MBRB'ox. **

_I still remember the look on your face_

_Been through the darkness at 1:58._

_The words that you whispered for just us to know._

_You told me you loved me so why did you go away?_

_Away._

The Doctor stared at the empty space in front of him. The empty chair stared back at him with its arms outstretched to him in a permanent gesture of comfort, but it wasn't comfort he needed now. He needed something that he never knew he had before. This strange, infuriating, mysterious woman had walked into his life with her captivating smile and her supreme knowledge of him and his working and before he had the chance to know a single thing about her, she had given her life to stop him taking his. It always hurt when a human life was lost. His hearts always ached at the thought of what that person could have been, would have done or the lives they would have effected had they not been prematurely taken by the hands of death. But this time...he knew that someone special had been stolen from him. She had walked in with that smile pulling at her lips and that oh so familiar yet oh so foreign greeting of 'Hello Sweetie'. He felt like he had heard those words thousands, millions, of times before and yet he was sure that he had never heard them roll off someone's tongue as they did off hers. She had claimed that she was from his future. She had said that they travelled together, adventured together. And yet he had never met her? The likelihood of it seemed impossible. She was a mere imposter who had done her research so very thoroughly. She had hidden intentions and she needed him to believe her. But she knew his name... she had his screwdriver that he was yet to ever hold. It had dampers on it. It had ingenious little added attachments that only he could have added. A future him. This woman was someone who knew him. Knew him better than anyone ever had. And now she was gone. Her last sentences spun through his head with unbelievable speed, a record on repeat that would just not stop. "It's okay. It's not over for you. You'll see me again. You've got all that to come." He remembered the emotion in her voice as she cradled her words and passed them to him like a precious gift. He could see the pain in her eyes, so sharp, as glimpses of her past – his future – flashed through her mind and brought a faint smile to her face. A smile laced with heart wrenching pain. Because she would never see him again and he didn't have a clue who she was. "You and me. Time and Space. You watch us run." And he knew he would watch. He knew that he would not be able to tear his eyes away from the pair of them as they ran. Ran from what, to what, or from where – he did not know. But he knew that it would be fascinating.

_I do recall now the smell of the rain._

_Fresh on the pavement, I ran off the plane._

_That July 9th, the beat of your heart._

_It jumps through your shirt, I can still feel your arms._

A young River Song beamed as she set her eyes on the incredible man in front of her. She hadn't seen him for while and it caused her heart to skip a beat when his eyes met hers and an impossible smile came over his lips. Everything that he brought with him was so exciting. The past. The future – they all made the present seem so promising. As she came closer to him, she barely noticed the pouring rain that was hammering down around her, catching in her hair and attempting to flatten it to her head with very little success. It meant nothing to her when the man in front of her was finally there. She had been waiting for him for what seemed like _so _long, but he was here now. That's all that mattered. As she got closer to him, she was engulfed by his scent. That precise mixture of confused time, pasts and futures all mixed up together, twisted space that has clung to him and planets from all over that have met this great man and held on to him for dear life. He smelt like nothing she has ever come across before, but it was the most beautiful smell she had ever know. It was him, and though she has only met him a few times, she knew that if he was to – god forbid – disappear tomorrow, she would always remember it and be searching. His arms were held out to her as she approached him and as he wrapped them around her, she could feel his powerful emotions radiating from him. She didn't understand how he knew so much about her, felt so much for her and yet had met her a mere couple months ago. It made her feel special. So unbelievably special because this great man wanted her. He needed her. And she knew she needed him. As her head fell on his chest, she could feel is two hearts beating in a magical rhythm and a smile played at her lips. She felt his hands grip her shoulders and pull her away from him, placing her at arms length so that he could examine her. His world weary eyes scanned her face quickly and he smiled when he found that there was no trace of pain in her features, and his eyes sparkled. River beamed back at him as silence fell between them, the heavy rain and the beating of his hearts being the only things that could be heard. Her eyes flicked to his lips and back up to him and she was so sure he was going to kiss her. But he didn't. Her heart gained a little hairline fracture when she realised that he wasn't going to kiss her in that moment, but she reassured herself with the knowledge that perhaps it was for the best. She was sure that their first kiss would come soon. She just needed to be patient and allow the Doctor space. Their first kiss would be with her soon... but she didn't realise that she was wishing on him a last kiss.

_And now I'll go sit on the floor wearing your clothes._

_All that I know is I don't know how to be something you miss._

_I never thought we'd have a last kiss._

_Never imagined we'd end like this._

_Your name forever the name on my lips._

The singing towers. She had never seen such a beautiful sight in her entire life – and she had seen some sights. He has turned up on her doorstep with the most beautiful new suit and a new haircut that she had mocked, but she knew he had detected the love in her eyes. She didn't see the love shining back and it cut her like a knife. She had faced the most fearsome beings in the universe and she had triumphed over them all. Occasionally, she had taken this great mans' hand and they had ran together. Away from the monsters. Away from the sights. But they had been together. It always hurts when she let his hand go and said goodbye to him not knowing which version of her love she would next see, but nothing hurt more than seeing him now, looking oh so handsome without a trace of love in his eyes. Their memories were not memories for him yet. They had spent precious time together, but she knew that he barely knew her. He knew that she was important to him, yes. He knew that she was someone he would eventually come to trust with his deepest, darkest secrets. But at the moment, she was just another possible companion. The unbearable look of distance that fell over his eyes when she stared at him scared her more than any monster ever could and she knew the day was coming when he would utter the fated words. "Who are you?". But for now, she would sit in her small apartment that was littered with memories and she would remember the singing towers. Surrounded by artifacts that made up her rather extraordinary history with the Doctor. The blanket that they had sat on when they picnicked on Asgard lay over the back of her sofa. A cutting from the planet One had grown into a large potted tree from where she had carved her message into the oldest rock face in the world. A desk and chair stolen from the orphanage she grew up in, taken at the dead of night from Earth. And she would sit among these things, and wonder why the Doctor had given her his most prized possession. She wondered how long she had left with him - it couldn't be long – and she wondered how she could face losing him forever. She didn't think she could face it. That would be the day she died.

_I do remember the swing in your step._

_The life of the party; you're showing off again._

_And I roll my eyes and then you pull me in._

_I'm not much on for dancing, but for you I did._

"I won't dance. I don't _do_ dancing" she told him again and again. It wasn't that she didn't want to dance with him... okay it was. It was the dancing part. Always the dancing. She hated it. She always felt that her limbs wouldn't do what she wanted to them and she couldn't get the image of a gawky little girl being laughed at out of her head. But the Doctor – now there was a man who loved to dance. He was the picture of horrific dancing and yet, he didn't care. He would gladly stand in the middle of a dance floor and it didn't matter what time, planet or dimension he was in, he would listen to the music and he would move to it. She had seen him do all manner of dances with his lanky arms and legs moving in every direction. He never failed to make him laugh when he danced. And he would always have every single person around him doing whichever ridiculous move he had come up with. They were desperate to be like this carefree, wonderful man who had landed in their midst and looked like he didn't have a care in the world. But she knew different. She knew the strain her poor man was under and to see him throw that all away – just for a moment – made her heart sore. And so when he approached her as she sat on the sides of the great dancing hall, a glass of champagne in hand, and asked her if she would _please_ dance with him, she simply couldn't refuse. She couldn't just say no one more time and take that look of complete innocent fun off his face. No matter how much she hated dancing. He took her hand and lead her to the very centre of the floor causing her face to go as red as her scarlet gown momentarily. As he began to dance, she rolled her eyes and started to cautiously move her hips in time with the music. He lifted her hand above their heads as he twisted and twirled, her laughter spurring him on. He loved to hear her laugh. Her worries of feeling foolish began to fade as he spun her around and she felt her legs begin to move on their own accord, her arms moving through the air and her hips and shoulders, making her body form new shapes and moves. The Doctor pulled her into him by her hand and planted a soft, quick kiss on her lips that caused her to absolutely beam. He didn't miss the glow that she seemed to emit as she continued to dance. He concluded it was the most beautiful thing he had ever seen.

_Because i love your handshake when you're meeting my father._

_I love how you walk with your hands in your pocket._

_How you'd kiss me when I was in the middle of saying something._

_There's not a day I don't miss those rude interruptions._

River Song looked at the young Doctor before her. She had seen him younger, but at least now he knew who she was and she didn't have to go through the horrific pain of seeing the absence of her in his life. She smiled as Amy and Rory walked into the central control room of the TARDIS where they had both been, her sat watching him and him flying around like a mad man trying to fly the old girl. But he was _her_ mad man. He just didn't know it quite yet.

'Rory! Rory, my man!' he exclaimed and bolted over to him, taking his hand and giving him a 'man hug', something he had recently discovered on earth and was extremely taken with. He frequently took Rory by the hand and slapped his back overenthusiastically. But Rory seemed used to the insane workings of the Doctor. With an overly pleased smile on his face, the Doctor went back to flicking switches and pulling levers that he didn't _quite_ know the function of until River could take it no more and stood up to help him fly the TARDIS as she liked to be flown – properly. She followed behind him like she had done so often, flicking the switches back, pressing the correct buttons and typing in accurate coordinates, but as she tapped in the last few digits of the sequence, his head popped up from behind a pillar and his face dropped.

'What... what're you doing? You don't touch the buttons. They're my buttons. They only work for me.' He babbled looking at her with sheer shock on his face. River threw one hand on her hip and looked at him with a smirk on her face.

'It appears they work for me too, my love.' The Doctors expression pulled her as close as possible to start laughing, but she managed to control herself as he battled with the idea that he wasn't the only one who could fly the TARDIS.

'I don't understand' was his only reply. River gave out a short laugh and began to move around the TARDIS pressing things and pulling things, pushing and flipping as she went into detail for him.

'Well you see, Sweetie. She likes me. She likes me a lot. I suppose you always thought that you knew everything about the old girl and that she only listened to you, but sometime a girl needs another girl to talk to. You know, woman to woman. And I listen to her, unlike you men. It's not your fault. It's a man thing. She just needed someone who would listen to what she wanted and fly her right. Someone who doesn't leave her breaks on just because they like the noise, for instance.' She ended her little speech very close to him, a smug smile on her face. But her eyes were a little sad. It was a sadness that Doctor noticed, and a sadness that _only_ he would notice. But he didn't question her on it. He didn't know her well enough to delve into her deep feelings that she was battling to hide yet. He had a feeling he would know her that well in the future. He wouldn't have to ask because he would know. But for now, he left her with her legs crossed at the knees as she leant on the TARDIS control board with one hand and the other slung on a hip. He turned from her in surprise and began to talk animatedly at Amy and Rory. River watched him. A soft sigh left her lips as she remembered that the Doctor she knew and loved – _her_ Doctor – would never have let her finish her words. He would have shut her up with a rude interruption of a soft kiss and she would have rolled her eyes or given him a cheeky wink. But this man before her was too polite to stop her talking mid flow. Too much of a stranger to spontaneously kiss her. And she would probably never see that Doctor again. Wretched timey-wimey nonsense.

_And I'll go sit on the floor wearing your clothes._

_All that I know is I don't know how to be something you miss._

_I never thought we'd have a last kiss._

_Never imagined we'd end like this._

_Your name forever the name on my lips._

The Doctor stared at the gun belt she had accidently left in the TARDIS when she had got changed from her usually jodhpurs and top style outfit into a far fancier evening dress. Her hair had been put up into an elegant updo with a few stray, untameable curls left free. When he had asked her where she was off to, she had just uttered the dreaded word 'spoilers' and disappeared, taking everything except her gun belt. He didn't doubt that she had multiple others strapped under that dress of hers. But he would keep this one for her because he knew that she would be back soon. She always was. That was the thing about them; they were never apart for too long. She would find him or he would find her. But they _would_ be found. The TARDIS seemed unusually quite as he took a seat in the control room. Of course is was – River had changed her settings and he didn't know how to change them back. River. She knew him so well and seemed to want so much from him. He knew that she tried not to, she tried to expect nothing from him and tried to make sure he knew that she loved him and understood that she knew he couldn't love her yet. But he felt so guilty. She had clearly seen a version of himself that would go to the ends of the universe to catch her, and he still would, but he didn't know why yet. He knew there was some feelings for her. He felt ecstatic whenever she was near, he made his hearts skip a beat, he even felt lust. But he didn't love her. Yet. He wondered what he could do to hurry the process up. What could he do to make himself fall in love with her quicker? He would do it. Anything. Anything just to stop the pain he saw pierce her whenever he was forced to admit that he was an earlier version than she had hoped. But he also knew that the more he learnt about her, the closer they were to the time when she knew less and less about him. And he never wanted that moment to come. He never wanted to look at her and see that she barely knew him and for her to have to tell him that she had met him a handful of times. He knew the guilt that came with saying those words and he wouldn't want to inflict that on anyone. Especially her.

_So I'll watch your life in pictures like I used to watch you sleep._

_And I'll feel you forget me like I used to feel you breath._

_And I'll keep up with our old friends just to ask them how you are._

_Hope it's nice where you are._

She had become an archaeologist so that she could find a good man. And she had found him, many times over. So many times. And here he was looking at her with eyes so young. Younger than she had ever, ever seen before. He had looked at her in wonder and confusion when she had pulled out her constant companion and he had seen it was in the shape of a mini TARDIS. He had had nothing but puzzlement on his face when she had asked him if they had done The Crash of the Byzantium. And then she realised. The screwdriver that he had given her was because he knew that she would need it. She didn't know how she would yet, but she knew that she would. The Doctor didn't do anything without a reason for it. She knew that this was the last time she would see him. The first time he met her. Every memory that they had would begin to be shared and no more would be made. Not for her, at least. This was the day she said hello to the man who she had fallen head over heels in love with. This was the day she said goodbye. She could feel her eyes welling up with a lifetimes worth of tears as she tried to face the fact that all the times she had faced her fears knowing that she was yet to face her ultimate terror, every time she had said that there was a worse day coming for her yet; that day was here. That day was now. She had seen him go from someone who knew every single detail about her and loved her so strongly to someone who had brushed her aside, scoffing at her career choice. As their timelines had switched, she had come to face the inevitable – that he was forgetting her. Each time they met, he knew less and less. Oh of course, sometimes he knew more. Sometimes he knew everything. After all, their timelines didn't work in a simple way. When he would turn up and surprise her by knowing her every habit and mannerism, she would want to cling to him so hard. And often she did. But that just meant that when he would appear and the familiarity wasn't there, it would ache and burn just that little bit more. She knew that she was never meant to have a simple life, but one that wasn't so incredibly befuddled would have been nice. But no, she wouldn't change a second of it. She wouldn't change her Doctor for the world. As she sat in the chair that she knew would bring her death, she bore her eyes into her lovers face one more time. He was so different, but she could still see him there. She hoped that he enjoyed their memories and meetings as much as she had. She prayed that he would love her as much as she loved him. She hoped that when he eventually said goodbye to the universe, she would be in his thoughts. Because he was all she was thinking about as blackness overcame her.

_And I hope the sun shines, and it's a beautiful day._

_And something reminds you, you wish you had stayed._

_You can plan for a change in the weather and time,_

_But I never planned on you changing your mind._

The Doctor stared down at the little girl in front of him. Her tight curls sprang from her head in all directions as she stood in the doorway of her room at the orphanage. Her eyes were so world weary already, and he could barely stop himself from scooping her up and dragging her from the awful place. Someone so young – so special – didn't deserve to be in such a dingy place. The lights were permanently low, the wallpaper was peeling, the windows broken more often than not. Yet she wanted to stay. This mad man with a box had appeared to her as if from one of her dreams and he had told her of wonderful things. Other worlds, deadly villains, beautiful planets. He had promised her the universe. And yet she had said no. She needed to stay here. She had something she needed to do, she was very sorry, but she was needed here. Those words broke his hearts. He knew exactly what she needed to do and he knew that he shouldn't be here in the first place, but he couldn't help himself. Like every mad man, he wanted to change things, but some things just did not want to be changed. He took her face in his hands and stared deep into her young eyes.

'You listen to me, River. You are amazing. You can do anything you want to do and you remember this; you don't have to do anything _you_ don't want to. There will be times you think there is no way out, but ohh believe me. There is. And you will find it because you're a special little girl. I wish you were coming with me. I really do. Are you sure you don't want to change your mind? I won't mind?' His tone raised in hope as he finished his words. He wanted her with him. He needed this little girl. She paused as she took in the face of the man before her.

'My name's not River. And I'm sorry mister, but I just can't. I do like you though. You're nice.' She said in the way that only a child can. Such honesty and emotion came through her words. The Doctor smiled sadly at her and stood up. With a little wave, he turned back to his box and began to walk towards it. With his hand on the door, he stopped briefly. He couldn't believe that he was leaving her. Perhaps he could just stay. Maybe he could just stay here and watch her grow. He could be the companion that _she _always needed. But no, it wouldn't work. She had made up her mind and besides, perhaps it was for the best. Timey-wimey madness should not be messed with. Even by the Doctor. As he pushed the door of the TARDIS open, he heard a little voice call after him.

'Mister?' he turned to the little girl, his eyes lit up. 'Perhaps you could come back when I'm older? I'd like to see you again.' The Doctor smiled a smile so big, it felt like his face would burst. He quickly went back to where she stood and stared into those wonderful eyes of hers.

'Yes. Yes River! You marvellous little thing! I will come back. I will. I promise.' With those cheerful words, he leant down and kissed the top of her head with such incredible tenderness, then walked back once again to the TARDIS, opened the door of the box and away he went, leaving the little girl to wonder who the mad man was. Where had he gone? She didn't know.

She hoped that they would be good friends.

_So I'll go sit on the floor wearing your clothes._

_All that I know is I don't know how to be something you miss._

_I never thought we'd have a last kiss._

_Never imagined we'd end like this._

_Your name forever the name on my lips._

_Forever the name on my lips._

_Just like our last._


End file.
